Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
