seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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