I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Dick very happy bro
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
