Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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