69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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