I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
honey bunches of taint.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
