Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Green mimosas i think yes
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
