why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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