i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize