you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Randomize
