i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
