i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize