the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better not be in your backpack
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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