Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
