The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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