I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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