So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
