Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
