So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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