Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I faked an abortion last night.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
