My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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