Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
