walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?