You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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