first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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