found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
