maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
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