I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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