somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize