He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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