pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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