I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
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