While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize