You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
If that was your dad, he is hot
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize