people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
