Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize