So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize