She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
We need to get me chipped asap
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
