"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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