...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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