You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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