I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
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