am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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