remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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