I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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