Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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