dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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