at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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