Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
