The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud